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We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves
~ Gautam Buddha
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Home-the sacred place
Home the spot of earth supremely blest A dearer, sweeter spot than all the rest. -by Robert Mont Gomery
Home is the place close to our heart,it is our own place. When we are tired it's coziness embraces us. When exhausted it soothes our soul with nourishment and rest. Its familiarity ensures us relaxation.
Despite being blessed with the material home, whenever we get attacked by the harsh world outside or by our own people or hurt and betrayal.We do tend to look for something elusive with the promise of succor. During the shattering moments usually the search for this elusive fails. But then also in perennial confusion we don’t realize the failure of search and measure to heal it.We don't understand what exactly the bruise heart need? As habitually for our need we look outside so this time too we fail to cater the need of self and leave it heal on its own.
Why do material stuffs at the moment of hurt fail miserably ? Why do they fail to rejuvenate ourselves? During the moment of hurt why do the presence of own people around us fail to install the lost happiness? Why? Why does the world around us crush in the moment? What exactly does the dearest soul look for? A place of succor to calm and heal our bruised soul. We need a space of our own with simple assurance to fight the storm without danger of further damage. A space which can incessantly supply us the desired strength and support to fight the crisis and can rejuvenate us on regular basis. We feel God’s hand over us when we have one.
Then why don’t we create our own space our home of soul - the real self -the pure self - the pristine- the one with which we had come on the earth. Why do we completely forget and ignore it.Everyone has a hermitage within us which is safe, cozy, comfortable and calm. To find the island of self one has to discover the real self.
The search for self or self referral entails discarding the unnecessary and working and embracing the real, without attachment to like and dislike.
Self referral is our true being, our real one with the basic needs. Self is fearless of any challenges as it comes with acceptance. Self gives acceptance to the circumstances and willingness to work on the shortcomings. It gives power to invest in our best without losing focus and remain unattached with the result.
Being in real self we respect ourselves (as we possess some unique talent which is nonparallel in this universe and we here to display our unique talent which is helpful to humanity). Though we are unique with our unique talent we do not feel beneath anyone. All these work out give us self power.
Without developing the real self we live in object referral. Opposite of self referral is object referral. We stay in object referral when we lose our focus from self. In object referral we look outside for our need. Object referral makes our reference point in “ego”. Ego is the mask, the role we are playing; it is not our real self. In object referral we constantly seek gratification outside and approval by others. We think and behave always in anticipation of response. We always feel to control things. We need an intense urge of external power that is based on the fear.
Amidst all chaos of the world outside, we must find our home - the sweet home-the real self- the strength- to safeguards from the whirling storm outside. Creating a sacred space of our own and being in it on regular basis is a strengthening exercise.
The real self is the most powerful place; it is within us. To visit inside and get in touch with it we don’t really need any money and means of commute but a desire to create one within and work on it on regular basis. It has everything to refurbish all dry springs of the soul.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Guru Purnima-the time of spiritual renewal
Every year this day of full moon falls on the month of Asadha (July-August).That day Vyasa the author of the Mahabharta was born. So the day is dedicated to honor the divine personage of Vyasa . Therefore the devotees worship him along with their respective spiritual preceptor or gurudevs.
Guru Purnima is the day of moon’s luminous brilliance and perfect form. The brilliance of luminous moon is synonymous as the guru’ grace and it is observed as the time for self realization. Just as the moon shines by reflecting the light of the sun and glorifies it, the disciples can shine like the moon by gaining knowledge from their guru.
Purnima the day of full moon means the proximity of moon to the earth which is considered to bring turmoil on human brain. As the proximity of the Moon bring same effect on human psyche as it does on tides. The day observed as being in gratitude to our guru actually safeguards us from that turmoil which usually leads us into indecisiveness as the human body holds enough water in its constitution. The state of gratitude brings the calmness which ultimately leads to focus. The calm mind provides flexibility which in turn helps to fight the tides of indecisiveness. Fighting the tides (indecisive) only saps energy whereas to move with tides saves life and wastage of energy.
Guru Purnima is the day of self referral where everyone has to find guru tattva the element of wisdom in ourselves. Guru tattva is the wisdom underlying in all of us. But each of us has to invoke it to bring at the surface and work for us. By awakening the tattva actually we allow wisdom to guide our path.
Wisdom only manifest through us when there is calmness. The reigning calmness provides us the light to introspect ourselves. So in the calmness which is guided by wisdom is the best time to review our actions and find out whether our actions are working for the growth or not.
The day of Guru Purnima is dedicated as the day of gratitude which we observe showing our respect to our guru. Here guru does not necessarily mean our teachers who taught us in institutions. But for all wonderful people of our lives who enriched our lives by imparting something as tips or suggestions which worked in our lives. So in some way the day deserves to show our gratitude to all those wonderful facilitators around us.
Being in gratitude ensures a healing effect and alignment of the chakras (the chakras are the energy centers of the body through which human body receives life force energy).so the day is here again to enrich all of us. Let the wisdom be our guide.
Guru Purnima is the day of moon’s luminous brilliance and perfect form. The brilliance of luminous moon is synonymous as the guru’ grace and it is observed as the time for self realization. Just as the moon shines by reflecting the light of the sun and glorifies it, the disciples can shine like the moon by gaining knowledge from their guru.
Purnima the day of full moon means the proximity of moon to the earth which is considered to bring turmoil on human brain. As the proximity of the Moon bring same effect on human psyche as it does on tides. The day observed as being in gratitude to our guru actually safeguards us from that turmoil which usually leads us into indecisiveness as the human body holds enough water in its constitution. The state of gratitude brings the calmness which ultimately leads to focus. The calm mind provides flexibility which in turn helps to fight the tides of indecisiveness. Fighting the tides (indecisive) only saps energy whereas to move with tides saves life and wastage of energy.
Guru Purnima is the day of self referral where everyone has to find guru tattva the element of wisdom in ourselves. Guru tattva is the wisdom underlying in all of us. But each of us has to invoke it to bring at the surface and work for us. By awakening the tattva actually we allow wisdom to guide our path.
Wisdom only manifest through us when there is calmness. The reigning calmness provides us the light to introspect ourselves. So in the calmness which is guided by wisdom is the best time to review our actions and find out whether our actions are working for the growth or not.
The day of Guru Purnima is dedicated as the day of gratitude which we observe showing our respect to our guru. Here guru does not necessarily mean our teachers who taught us in institutions. But for all wonderful people of our lives who enriched our lives by imparting something as tips or suggestions which worked in our lives. So in some way the day deserves to show our gratitude to all those wonderful facilitators around us.
Being in gratitude ensures a healing effect and alignment of the chakras (the chakras are the energy centers of the body through which human body receives life force energy).so the day is here again to enrich all of us. Let the wisdom be our guide.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Judiciously finance your energy budget-1
How many of us really belong to that rare tribe who do not get in awe after encountering glowing skin, shiny hairs and eyes of a beautiful diva. Most of us naturally tuned to get mesmerized by the generous exposure of the intelligence displayed by dynamic professional or by the learning power of a child prodigy. Most of us aspire to be like them. After all what keep them so elevated where as so many of us struggle through out the day to hide our chronic fatigue syndrome. Yes, they either are gifted with enough life force energy or they exactly know how to sustain it.
As body constitution of one person differs with another so does the vitality. Even the level of dissipation of energy while dealing with different circumstances varies from person to person. The emotions which root out as a response to life experiences too vary from one individual to another.Thus the emotions displayed by the individual is proportional to vitality held by him. A person of particular constitution holds different level of life force energy. It means that the amount of this vital life force energy one beholds that acts as determiner for our behavior and success. It has direct bearing on the behavior and success parameter of one’s life.
As the life force energy determines our behavior and success in life, therefore behavior can be molded or groomed consciously directing our thought patterns. If it is so than an investment of effort for desired result seems a right preposition to deal with the ruling crisis i.e. low performance and fatigue. Therefore an investment in our effort to control behavior pattern ensures enhancement in ones life force energy.
Eventually the need for investment in energy arises?
It is futile to run low at the expense of precious life force energy. Every thought of low energy or negative energy expenses further energy. It is like complaining persistently about poverty at the same time wasting money on transient trivial. The wisdom lies in the fact to prevent squandering of too much of it by conscious efforts.
How to check wastage of life force energy?
To begin with it is better to first acknowledge the culprits who consciously plunder our life force energy. They are anxiety, anger, frustration, long term stress, excessive indulgence, smoking, recreational drugs, promiscuous relationship and lack of sleep and rest.
To nourish the vitality of life there is need to acknowledge the life supporting factors that include air, water, food, and most important a calm disposition. The kind of food, water and air we take hold the promise to nourish and drain this vital energy.
Very often the people around us affect our state of calmness by either gravitating or toxicating us. So we must beware of that energy drainer around us.
To impart more glow to life a peaceful meditation, yoga, and pranayama which are designed to calm the mind and revitalize nervous system should be included in routine.
Food also play key role in managing our moods and emotions. Special preference should be given to fibrous fruits and vegetables and grains. Anything fresh and colorful is good for building energy. Similarly, anything stale, old, and preserved depletes energy leaving us sluggish and sleepy most of the time. They simply act as filler which can only satiate our palate for the while and add low quality bulk sapping our precious energy. These food do not promise any strength and even hard to digest.
So it is save to go ahead with little tact while we dispense our precious life force energy. Are few of us still skeptical about the discretionary handling of this precious life force energy? Naturally it is the choices of ours that shape the lives.
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Swine Flu
The swine flu is a menacing addition of ongoing decade. In the beginning its familiarity with common weather changing flu symptoms escaped it from necessary stringent action. Soon it took the form of pandemic, with its menacing grip. The swine flu virus is quick at mutating. Thus by endlessly changing the shape of its protein coat the virus is able to dodge the human immune system.
The pandemic swine flu or A (H1N1), first detected in Mexico in April 20009. Now India alone has recorded 31,934 infections and 1,531 deaths since its first case in 20009. What does make the pandemic so sinister? What is the constitution of the virus? “It is a “triple reassortment” virus, which is made up of segment from human, swine and avian viruses-as suggested by experts.”
The pre pandemic immunization to deal the crisis is taken. But the success gets hindered, as still there is no way to find out which strain of influenza will hit next. As a result the pandemic vaccines would need to contain “a cocktail of strains”.
The indigenous swine flu vaccines of India are launched. The leading pharmaceutical firms’ Zydus Cedilla, Bharat Biotech, Panacea Biotech and the serum institute are fore runners in vaccine productions.
The Tropical countries (including India) are mutation hot spot of swine flu, as these countries in particular harbor many influenza viruses. Next human in poor tropical often live in close proximity to livestock.
As a highly transmissible virus it spreads quickly in dense populated country where people with limited resources find themselves difficult to combat it.
Prevention from swine flu entails three steps-
First its outbreak is controlled in swine.
Then its transmission is prevented among human.
Next its spread is prevented among human to check the pandemic form.
symptoms of swine flu in human-
Fever, lethargy, lack of appetite, runny nose, sore throat, coughing, diarrhea, nausea, vomiting.
How does infection spread?
• By exposure to infected droplets which come in air by coughing and sneezing.
• Through contaminated hands and surfaces.
DO’S-
• Avoid crowded place.
• Use mask when near an infected person.
• Wash hands with antiseptic soap.
What kind of symptoms call for medical attention?
• Shortness of breath or difficulty in breathing.
• More than three days continued high fever.
• Children with labored breathing and continuing fever or convulsions (seizures).
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Rath Yatra - the journey of soul
The ten days festivity of Rath Yatra in which the presiding deities of main temple Sri Mandira-Lord Jagannath, Lord Balabhadra and Goddess Subhdra are taken out from the temple precinct for annual pilgrimage in an elaborate ritual procession. The festival commences at around 4 a.m. with Mangal Aarthi and the Yatra starts to Gundicha temple two km away in Puri from main temple Sri Mandir.
The grandest festival of Rath Yatra is celebrated at the full moon phase of June –July (in the month of Asadha ). The yatra literally means a journey. The ten days festival of Rath Yatra which starts at the second day of Sukla Paksha signifies the journey of the soul-during the waxing phase of the moon -a right time to start austerity. The waxing of the moon helps to build up mental strength and restore calmness. Austerity under taken in the period increases sankalpa which is beneficial.
Lord Jagannath is identified as Vishnu and Krishna. In the original manifestation of Nilamadhaba, Lord is worshipped as sacred Nyagrodha Briksha or banyan tree –the huge tree gives its shade to everyone who comes underneath it. In the same way anyone who comes under the refuge of lord Jagannath is emancipated and gets relieve from sufferings.
The sanctity of the festival is such that even a touch of the chariot or even the ropes with which these are pulled is considered enough to confer the result of several pious deeds or penance for ages.
The believe signifies that only through the cleansing of soul and mind one can lead a peaceful existence. Therefore the ten days festival is actually a time to take the inner journey of soul , to work and contemplate on the measures to clean and strengthen it. Through the morality awareness comes and then on the firm platform of awareness the wisdom builds.
The whole concept of this annual pilgrimage of deities of Sri Mandir has been explained in Kathopanishada. “ The body is the chariot and the soul is the deity installed in the chariot. The wisdom acts as the charioteer to control the mind and thoughts.”
The grandest festival of Rath Yatra is celebrated at the full moon phase of June –July (in the month of Asadha ). The yatra literally means a journey. The ten days festival of Rath Yatra which starts at the second day of Sukla Paksha signifies the journey of the soul-during the waxing phase of the moon -a right time to start austerity. The waxing of the moon helps to build up mental strength and restore calmness. Austerity under taken in the period increases sankalpa which is beneficial.
Lord Jagannath is identified as Vishnu and Krishna. In the original manifestation of Nilamadhaba, Lord is worshipped as sacred Nyagrodha Briksha or banyan tree –the huge tree gives its shade to everyone who comes underneath it. In the same way anyone who comes under the refuge of lord Jagannath is emancipated and gets relieve from sufferings.
The sanctity of the festival is such that even a touch of the chariot or even the ropes with which these are pulled is considered enough to confer the result of several pious deeds or penance for ages.
The believe signifies that only through the cleansing of soul and mind one can lead a peaceful existence. Therefore the ten days festival is actually a time to take the inner journey of soul , to work and contemplate on the measures to clean and strengthen it. Through the morality awareness comes and then on the firm platform of awareness the wisdom builds.
The whole concept of this annual pilgrimage of deities of Sri Mandir has been explained in Kathopanishada. “ The body is the chariot and the soul is the deity installed in the chariot. The wisdom acts as the charioteer to control the mind and thoughts.”
Sunday, July 11, 2010
A melting pot of strategies
Simmering with its usual routines the place seemed a hot spot, an action oriented belly of Homo sapiens. Qualified as an outcome of stressed lives it was naturally viewed by most of us as a world of distress. Where one’s presence taken as a cruel joke of destiny and by the wisdom oriented soul as a mitigation of karmic accumulation. Oblivious of the down and dusk of the world outside ,it was revolving in the precision of emergency handling.
In this entrepreneurship era where dedication and honesty under the premier brand were promised to clients. Naturally the etiquette and politeness were used as strategic mantra to give edge to contender. But in that diverse community I found an inbuilt stratagem of action to rule out the worst. An earnest approach was there to work for the best with detachment. Everyone in that phenyl swabbed ambience seemed to approach the crisis strategically.
Under the effect of nauseating headache and dose of last night's medicine I was still reeling. The splitting headache my marathon raced brain accumulated last night while I was dealing with the ongoing crisis and procuring admission in the hospital. Eventually with the terrible aching I had hard time to keep the pace with the punctuality of the staffs over there. The paramedical who had rescued me last night from that tumultuous headache with an effective doze of medicine. He came in the morning with a ward boy to steer him to the ground floor for requisite tests. Out of concern he advised me to accompany them on the ground floor at my ease.
Half an hour later fighting unfamiliarity of numerous units of therapeutic world
I reached the destination.
In that centrally cooled corridor of pathological unit I sat on one of the recliners placed for patient’s kin. Braving the tides of hope and despair in that oriented space, I brooded over the ongoing crisis. Bereaved of options I decided to take on the suggestions prescribed by the specialists there.
My strained brain longed for fresh air as the chill of the closed place nauseated me further. But that was not possible I moved my attention to the people over there. The inbuilt urgency was palpable in all the proceedings over there.
However the hot spot had their own share of occasional gloom, yet I found it as a multitasking space of strategies. At one corner at a wheeled stretcher a semi comatose patient was striped in wire and with numerous tubes had been frantically making ruckus. Whereas some blessed with less troubles were silently waiting for their turns.
In the seat beside me an outdoor patient was there with his wife. With all requisite papers and files of med claim papers he was busily weighing down the pros and cons of the procedure.
The reception area and the waiting area at the ground floor were partitioned by the framed glass. Therefore the view of the entrance and reception was visible from the central corridor of the waiting area. Suddenly at the reception area a stirred movement of despair became visible and a fleet of surgeons and paramedical in their vibrated urgency made their way in to emergency unit.
To escape the heaviness of the sight I steered my attention to other corner. Through the canteen end, a blue uniformed canteen staff brisked holding a plate with a firm placed apple on it. Startled at the firm and non moving grip of apple at the plate, at first I blamed my splitting headache of last night. The mystery behind it got unfolded soon when he neared me. As it was packed hygienically by the cellophane paper and tapped at the plate, to ward off the floating germs of the air.
A feat of war foot strategy was visible everywhere- be it food and dealings involved with the patients.
Few elderly a must of those spaces were also occupying the space. A lady waiting for her pathological test slowly got up from her place to loosen the stiffness that was setting in her joints. She would walk to other end but a simple turn to move back after reaching the wall seemed a big effort to her. When she walked to me fearing her fall I bent my outstretched legs. She smiled at me and kept walking. A silent empathy created between us. With every walk she would halt at my place with a glow of smile on her sculpted elderly face.
“For knee transplantation I am here, waiting to go through some routine tests. My only daughter stays in States. She is married and a working lady. How will she get time for me? I too didn’t want to disturb her. Now I am already in the last stage of age where surgery works. After few years I will cross that age too. Earlier I refused as I would get frightened with the prospect of surgery. Now I decided to undertake it.” She pointed at her husband who was sitting on one of the recliner busy flipping some papers. She continued, “I am eight years younger than him. God knows who will be left alone after few years? I want to live on my own. This surgery will last for decade only, but at least that ten years I would be able to spend with dignity.”
I saw he was coming out of the unit in the hospital’s robes and banded wrist. He caught me talking congenially with someone and a bit relived with that last night terrible migraine attack. He sat in front of me against the wall throwing a smile. Soon he got busy on the calls instructing message to relieve the load of his work. When I switched my place and sat beside him, he simply threw another glancing smile of assurance and kept himself busy on calls. That time he was enquiring about his lost luggage at the Thai Air port.
I felt an action oriented strategy in the ambience and in every work over there and a strong resolve to fight the crisis to best of ability. What amazed me most that the poignancy of strategies was influencing the people present over there. That is why as a premier health provider it had been leading the race with dazzling height. I received an inbuilt strategic lesson and resolve to fight the problems over there.
In this entrepreneurship era where dedication and honesty under the premier brand were promised to clients. Naturally the etiquette and politeness were used as strategic mantra to give edge to contender. But in that diverse community I found an inbuilt stratagem of action to rule out the worst. An earnest approach was there to work for the best with detachment. Everyone in that phenyl swabbed ambience seemed to approach the crisis strategically.
Under the effect of nauseating headache and dose of last night's medicine I was still reeling. The splitting headache my marathon raced brain accumulated last night while I was dealing with the ongoing crisis and procuring admission in the hospital. Eventually with the terrible aching I had hard time to keep the pace with the punctuality of the staffs over there. The paramedical who had rescued me last night from that tumultuous headache with an effective doze of medicine. He came in the morning with a ward boy to steer him to the ground floor for requisite tests. Out of concern he advised me to accompany them on the ground floor at my ease.
Half an hour later fighting unfamiliarity of numerous units of therapeutic world
I reached the destination.
In that centrally cooled corridor of pathological unit I sat on one of the recliners placed for patient’s kin. Braving the tides of hope and despair in that oriented space, I brooded over the ongoing crisis. Bereaved of options I decided to take on the suggestions prescribed by the specialists there.
My strained brain longed for fresh air as the chill of the closed place nauseated me further. But that was not possible I moved my attention to the people over there. The inbuilt urgency was palpable in all the proceedings over there.
However the hot spot had their own share of occasional gloom, yet I found it as a multitasking space of strategies. At one corner at a wheeled stretcher a semi comatose patient was striped in wire and with numerous tubes had been frantically making ruckus. Whereas some blessed with less troubles were silently waiting for their turns.
In the seat beside me an outdoor patient was there with his wife. With all requisite papers and files of med claim papers he was busily weighing down the pros and cons of the procedure.
The reception area and the waiting area at the ground floor were partitioned by the framed glass. Therefore the view of the entrance and reception was visible from the central corridor of the waiting area. Suddenly at the reception area a stirred movement of despair became visible and a fleet of surgeons and paramedical in their vibrated urgency made their way in to emergency unit.
To escape the heaviness of the sight I steered my attention to other corner. Through the canteen end, a blue uniformed canteen staff brisked holding a plate with a firm placed apple on it. Startled at the firm and non moving grip of apple at the plate, at first I blamed my splitting headache of last night. The mystery behind it got unfolded soon when he neared me. As it was packed hygienically by the cellophane paper and tapped at the plate, to ward off the floating germs of the air.
A feat of war foot strategy was visible everywhere- be it food and dealings involved with the patients.
Few elderly a must of those spaces were also occupying the space. A lady waiting for her pathological test slowly got up from her place to loosen the stiffness that was setting in her joints. She would walk to other end but a simple turn to move back after reaching the wall seemed a big effort to her. When she walked to me fearing her fall I bent my outstretched legs. She smiled at me and kept walking. A silent empathy created between us. With every walk she would halt at my place with a glow of smile on her sculpted elderly face.
“For knee transplantation I am here, waiting to go through some routine tests. My only daughter stays in States. She is married and a working lady. How will she get time for me? I too didn’t want to disturb her. Now I am already in the last stage of age where surgery works. After few years I will cross that age too. Earlier I refused as I would get frightened with the prospect of surgery. Now I decided to undertake it.” She pointed at her husband who was sitting on one of the recliner busy flipping some papers. She continued, “I am eight years younger than him. God knows who will be left alone after few years? I want to live on my own. This surgery will last for decade only, but at least that ten years I would be able to spend with dignity.”
I saw he was coming out of the unit in the hospital’s robes and banded wrist. He caught me talking congenially with someone and a bit relived with that last night terrible migraine attack. He sat in front of me against the wall throwing a smile. Soon he got busy on the calls instructing message to relieve the load of his work. When I switched my place and sat beside him, he simply threw another glancing smile of assurance and kept himself busy on calls. That time he was enquiring about his lost luggage at the Thai Air port.
I felt an action oriented strategy in the ambience and in every work over there and a strong resolve to fight the crisis to best of ability. What amazed me most that the poignancy of strategies was influencing the people present over there. That is why as a premier health provider it had been leading the race with dazzling height. I received an inbuilt strategic lesson and resolve to fight the problems over there.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Rain, rain, came again
Let the rain kiss you. Let the rain splash you,let it wash the gloom of dust out of our lives. Let the rain soothe you to meet farthest dreams of your soul. Finally to bless and respite us from the long, sweltering heat, the refreshing monsoon is here again.Opening the vistas of enjoyment that range from being outdoors and feeling the rain all over the. Even the holed up hours of long spelled drizzling offers the option of gazing it with a hot cup of tea and favorite book in hand. The added charm of the spell is nature watching and playing outdoor games like soccer in all favorite mania of FIFA. However with best of its charms, come the spoil sports like water-borne diseases and monsoon aided maladies.
Monsoon maladies and their symptoms:
Diarrhea- cramping, abdominal pain, bloating, nausea, watery stools, fever and sometimes bloody stools.
Typhoid- headache, fatigue, stomach pain, high fever and loss of appetite.
Hepatitis A- yellow tinge of skin, eyes and nails (bilirubin build-up in body due to liver dysfunction). Fungal infections- red rashes accompanied with itching.
Appearance of any of these symptoms should be taken as signal to visit a doctor immediately.
Dos:
• Drink boiled or bottled water only.
• Wash hands with antiseptic before eating and cooking and after coming from outdoors. • Eat only boiled, cooked and peeled fruits and vegetables.
• Keep kitchens as well as bathrooms clean and sanitized.
Water borne diseases:
Malaria and dengue are the main maladies of the season. To eliminate these, prevention is better recommended than cure. So take the following measures to check it:
• Install nets for windows and doors.
• Use mosquito nets.
• Eliminate sources of water accumulation in and around the house or spray oil and disinfectant to check breeding of mosquitoes.
Having armed ourselves with all precautions and safety measures, it’s time to wade in and enjoy the rain. Have a happy monsoon!
Friday, July 2, 2010
A cocooned world of compassion
As the reigning numbness of inside grew soon it engulfed the world outside. The impacted moments were passing like an ages. The phenyl swabbed space with its chilly tinge felt eerie. The squeaky wheels of rolling stretchers with white uniformed attendants were the only traffic in the place. In addition, the serious, mumbled discussions of green robed surgeons appearing in and out of the O.T. and the angiography ward were the indispensable sights. Amidst them were the hapless family members of patients, with their taxing destinies. All of them had occupied the place either engulfed in a marooning silence or praying according to their fate.
Standing in the corridor, I caught a glimpse of him. The stretcher was taking him inside. Then the inching gap grew longer and I found myself in front of a closed door. Standing in the corridor of the angiography unit, I felt more nervous. The gloom seemed overwhelmingly deep with beating tides of hopelessness. Be strong, the words echoed through me. To sink into regret at the moment felt like a luxury that I could not afford. To compose my disoriented self I chose to pray, “Are you listening to me, God?” I concentrated on my refuge.
“A good, clear report of his…”
“I don’t want to be here…” with a wailing heart, I kept reiterating. After a while the anxiety started melting into stillness. Grounded in my hard-earned strength, I sighed and speculated, “How long will it take to complete the procedure?”I tried to chalk out the duration of involved time with a fatigued mind, heavy enough with an overnight commute and spent awake.
“Ma’am, you can sit in waiting room” a ward boy suggested to me, pointing with his hand towards the hall around the corner.
The room was big with trendy cushioned recliners in rows. A few big LCD screens on the wall were perhaps telecasting health awareness issues, my unsettled conscious failed to register.
I moved ahead between the rows to find a place in solitude. My parched lips and troubled mind longed to take refuge in prayer. I staggered ahead to find a few vacant chairs in front of chattering group. Heavily I sat on one of them in front of the busily discussing lot. I simply tried to sink my disoriented self into an inner space. I slipped my fingers in my handbag to take out my amulet and clasping it in my palm, I prayed deeply, feeling the moistness on my cheeks. "Lord please, a clean report of his---please help”.
I glanced at the time. Twenty minutes had already passed; he might have been taken out by now, I thought. I decided to check it out.
I found a surge in the crowd outside in the corridor joining the angioplasty unit at the other end. The setting of dusk was signaled through the reflections of lamps and lights on the glazed flooring. The fleet of moving limbs and the mumbled noise of the crowd signaled the commencement of visiting hours in the distressed cocooned world.
“How long will it take?” I inquired, clearing my throat. “Half an hour more”, a masked paramedic replied. I took a deep breath to restore my strength to walk once again through the corridor.
A hierarchy of agony was floating in the space, I felt, varying according to strength of kith and kin. The big business family surrounded by their hovering folks was chattering on every pro and con involved in the case.
My place was occupied so I staggered ahead in between the rows. My searching gaze was acknowledged by a lady sitting beside a vacant recliner with her hand bag. She lifted her bag from the chair and beckoned to me. Despite her display of solicitousness, I felt an intense and chilling silence around her, but I could not muster enough courage to refuse her helpful gesture. Mechanically I moved towards the place.
While taking my place, I got a reflection of a sealed anguish on her face. I steered myself in my inner space for much needed strength. Even with closed eyes, I felt an agonized desperation in my neighboring seat. Subsequently I opened my eyes to find out. With a frozen expression, she was gaping at me. Her face showed the bliss of conjugal life, yet a shock of recent devastation was palpable. I just tried to smile hiding my anxiety. She seemed to find solace even in my forced smile. In that silence, her proximity again forced me to feel an icy heaviness. She sighed and initiated, “See, how people create noise even in these spaces, where everyone else opts to pray”. I tried to reciprocate in affirmation, concealing my own all whirling apprehensions. Agonized in her paralyzed world and looking blankly at me, in a chilly tone she continued “Twenty one days have already passed; every day I wake up in the morning with prayers on my lips, commuting the distance of a hundred kilometers, in hope to see my son revived out of coma; eight lakhs have already been spent on his treatment and we’re still waiting for the miracle to happen.” She continued bonding with the anxiety ridden world. “He had completed nineteen years this year. After his plus two, I had him admitted in the college in this city. Three months back I had gifted him that fateful bike to commute the distance to his college. He met with this accident with two of his friends”. She completed her story uncalled and uninitiated to a complete stranger, pouring out her screaming heart. By then, her heart was parched of tears. Most likely she was trying to elicit some compassion to fill her humanly urge of survival.
A sad silence crept again between us. Gathering my own disorientation I tried to pacify her. My lips moved incoherently attempting words of consolation, but my own fear within me kept failing me. I just stared at her compassionately.
I heard a paramedical staff was addressing me from the distance “Ma’am, you are being called to the conference room”, my heart pounded. With prayers in my lips, I followed him.
An internationally acclaimed stalwart of the therapeutic world was suggested to us by a specialist and family friend. A medical wizard of tremendous repute, he sailed in the room with his shot at pretended sternness. Sounding serious, he commented “On your part, you have tried very hard to tag him sick but see, we both won and you got defeated. He is alright, take him and don’t come here again.” and he grinned at me. A cool lump shifted from throat to heart, cooling me all over. The suppressed agony of days flooded in my eyes; my lips trembled with prayers full of gratitude.
I glanced at him when his stretcher was rolling out of the unit. He smiled back; his relaxed expression eased my stifled brain into normalizing. When his stretcher rolled near me, the ward boy smilingly suggested “Ma’am, you can go to your room, we will be there in a few minutes.” Feeling relieved I took a deep breath to start praying once again, this time for that anguished mother. “Lord, are you listening to me…”
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